Take the lead

This past weekend I went swing dancing. It is one of the Saturday night activities that I enjoy. Honestly, I'm pretty good on my feet. I've decided that I'm going to have big band at my wedding reception so we can all swing dance. (Not that I'm planning a wedding, or have a ring, or a man....lol)

At any rate, I've made a few observations with swing dancing. For starters, the man must lead. It is not totally impossible to for the woman to lead. I mean I can tell a man how to turn me or where to put his hand, but for us to have a smooth dance, he's got to do it himself. He's got to take the lead.

In today's society, men have stopped taking the lead and many of us women don't know how to follow. But in swing dancing, it's not so. There have been those times when I didn't think the guy was doing the right move so I just put my hand where it was supposed to go, but it just didn't work. He wasn't ready and it just screwed up the whole move. If the man doesn't know what he's doing, the woman never gets a chance to strut her stuff. She's got to keep up with him. However, if a man really knows what he's doing, an inexperienced woman will look great, as long as she follows his lead.

This past weekend, I found it very interesting that I danced with a guy who's moves were too passive and subtle. So as we danced, I was doing guess work. I was guessing where he wanted me to go and in turn I took the dance over a bit more. It's actually the same in relationships. When a man is passive and a woman sees no leadership, she instictively takes over. A man is her security, but when he's not leading she becomes more dominate to give the relationship the stability. However, it's still unnatural.

I also got the change to dance with several guys who know what they were doing. I enjoyed dancing with this one in particular because every move was pointed and confident. I had no question of what he wanted and no problem following his lead. He would guide me in a spin and was quick to snap me back. He was confident in who he was and it freed me to be, it freed me to dance and strut in all my glory. Honestly, I loved every moment of it.

It really is a myth that women don't know how to be submissive and let the man be the head. Gentlemen, I invite you to start taking the lead.